Page 2 of 3
Posted: Mon Dec 13, 10 5:54 pm
by Trigger_Andy
justin3663 wrote:North Allerton is the only place in the UK where an earthquake will do improvements
The women are easy to pull just offer them 50p and half a pound of grapes. Grapes are exotic food for them but don't take bananas as they will consider that a proposal of marriage.
The men have a simple outlook on life....Drink Beer...Smoke Blokes.
Enjoy
Posted: Mon Dec 13, 10 8:45 pm
by Dart Vader
Andy on the edit again
Posted: Mon Dec 13, 10 9:09 pm
by R.RUNNER
Posted: Mon Dec 13, 10 9:45 pm
by Chris&Adam
Eer all, see all, seh nowt. Eight all, drink all, pay nowt and if tha does owt fo nowt do it fo thissen.
Stick to this old Yorkshire saying and you will not go far wrong!!!
Posted: Tue Dec 14, 10 8:02 am
by Anonymous
I had to read that a few times to get my head round it. What does 'thissen' refer to?
Posted: Tue Dec 14, 10 8:27 am
by latil
Clivey wrote:I had to read that a few times to get my head round it. What does 'thissen' refer to?
Yourself.
Posted: Tue Dec 14, 10 3:52 pm
by Anonymous
Yoiykshire humour.
read these out aloud
Yorkshire man takes his cat to the vet.
Yorkshireman: Ayup, lad, I need to talk to thee about me cat.
Vet: Is it a tom?
Yorkshireman: Nay, I've browt it with us.
A Yorkshireman's dog dies and as it was a favourite pet he decides to have a gold statue made by a jeweller to remember the dog by.
Yorkshireman: Can tha mek us a gold statue of yon dog?
Jeweller: Do you want it 18 carat?
Yorkshireman: No I want it chewin' a bone yer daft beggar.
A Yorkshireman's wife dies and the widower decides that her headstone should have the words "she were thine" engraved on it. He calls the stone mason, who assures him that the headstone will be ready a few days after the funeral. True to his word the stone mason calls the widower to say that the headstone is ready and would he like to come and have a look.
When the widower gets there he takes one look at the stone to see that it's been engraved "she were thin".
He explodes, 'Blimey man, you've left the "e" out.'
The stone mason apologises and assures the poor widower that it will be rectified the following morning. Next day comes and the widower returns to the stone mason, 'There you go sir, I've put the "e" on the stone for you.'
The widower looks at the stone and then reads out aloud, 'E, she were thin.'
Posted: Tue Dec 14, 10 4:18 pm
by Ivor
Brilliantn nearly drowned in me black tea with no sugar...and E, I'm thin too!
Posted: Tue Dec 14, 10 4:54 pm
by Anonymous
You wish Ivor
where you going to put that turkey?
Posted: Tue Dec 14, 10 5:17 pm
by Ivor
Lost nearly two stone Bob, just by packing up the booze, chips, rice, pasta, cake and sugar in my tea...I don't think I'm going to live any longer, I think it;'s just going to feel that way!
Anyway, as of next Wednesday the diet goes out of the woindow and starts again in the new year.
I might even do a press up.
Posted: Tue Dec 14, 10 5:22 pm
by R.RUNNER
HOW MANY STONE???????????????
Did anyone start a "CAPTION" competition for this photo ????????????
Posted: Tue Dec 14, 10 5:26 pm
by Anonymous
I see they had to tie a string to his belt to make sure he did not wander off
Posted: Tue Dec 14, 10 6:08 pm
by Ivor
Thanks Bob and Mister R, here I am trying to battle years of abusing my body with fags, booze and heaven knows what and what sort of support do I get?
Naff all, because I still had a bit of a paunch at the show...I dunno
Posted: Wed Dec 15, 10 11:43 am
by Stu
Watch out for the new drugs craze if you go out up there, Clivey. They've taken to injecting ecstasy directly below their teeth to get it into the bloodstream quicker.
(Wait for it...)
Police are calling it "E by Gum."
(
)
Posted: Wed Dec 15, 10 12:16 pm
by steveo
Stu wrote:Watch out for the new drugs craze if you go out up there, Clivey. They've taken to injecting ecstasy directly below their teeth to get it into the bloodstream quicker.
(Wait for it...)
Police are calling it "E by Gum."
(
)
thats funny